The Absolute Right Place to Look for Answers

Have you ever pulled a weed out of the crack in the sidewalk only to find it growing back a week later?

Holy perseverance Batman!

It seems that some problems have the same tenacity.  Particular problems seems to follow certain people around like an adoring Yellow Lab waiting patiently for their ration of attention.

Tell me, what could be causing a person to experience serial rejection in relationships?  Or how about the people who repeatedly get taken advantage of?  And what about those of us who manage to lose weight only to gain it back?

How does a person spank these intrusions directly out of their life, door shut, not happening, end-of-story?

Truly deeply, the way out is in...

The suggestion that we "turn inward" can be crazy-making when we don't know what to look for and, at the same time, if we don't start looking we are never going to find it.  The "it" being our answers of course....solutions to our problems, guidance on our decisions, knowing our next best step, knowing what we need in this moment.  They are all there, waiting for us to show up and respect what they have to say.

How? When all we seem to hear when we listen is "thinking" with brief periods of thinking in between?

  We start with a willingness to connect, show up, and be present with ourselves, like an adoring parent, kind and confident in the art of problem solving. 

If this is new or awkward, trust the growth process.  The same way an oak seed the size of a thimble grows to be 50 feet tall.  Trust in your own goodness and perfectness. Trust that you will develop discernment with the messages that you hear just like the oak "trusts" that its leaves will push their way out when the Spring sun warms the air.

  We follow our willingness with a tag team of awareness and acceptance for every molecule of our experience.  One dose of each and we won't need to call anyone in the morning.

We can use our awareness to shift away from the story of the struggles and put our energy into identifying the objective facts instead.  It helps us to see the facts as separate from ourselves and all our judgments about how good or bad we think we are or someone else is.  We clear the air by sticking to the data. What is happening?  We see the circumstances for what they are and gain peace by accepting the uncomfortable truth.  Like it or not.

Then, we ask ourselves a few simple questions.

What do I feel?

What are my feelings telling me?

What do I want/need?

Finally, we decide on one supportive loving action we can take to nurture ourselves in the situation. This may be as simple as showing ourselves compassion for being caught in a spider web or we may decide to have a courageous conversation. It is critical that we follow through for ourselves regardless of what we choose. 

Thanks for reading.